Glitter

What does the word 'control' mean to you?   The word control is thrown around the diabetes world like glitter. Everywhere we go people ask . . .

 "do you have your diabetes in control?" 

"those complications won't happen to you because you're in control right?"

"you need to control those sugars!"

"you should try x, y & z, you'll have way better control." 

And while we nod politely, we question whether or not we are in control? Who is in control? Because some days diabetes feels in control and I feel more like a passive passenger who wishes the driver would turn the air on because it's getting hot back here....

I personally do not like using the word control, and maybe I've used it before without noticing, but I'll blame that on the fact that control is one of the primary words used for diabetes both socially and medically.  We expect that our blood sugars are in control if we want to drive, if we want to  have children, even if we want to use the elliptical at the gym (warnings for people with diabetes everywhere!)

Diabetes is a disease that requires 24/7 care. It requires a whole bucket of guesstimating and a four leaf clover for good luck.   As much as we strive for 'control' sometimes no matter what we do, diabetes fights back with vengeance. If we got through the day without eating the entire pantry, or having to run our insulin pumps at 150%, does that count as control?  

Each day is a different story and some days are better than others. What control means to one person, may not resonate with another.

Kayla